my sentiments exactly 🫶
perhaps the greatest film ever made
my landlord has been lurking outside my back door all afternoon sweeping the spot right in front of my back door for 2 hours in a very obvious attempt to engage me in conflict and I am not engaging
Lucie is trying to get out of paying me $3,000 and also the lawsuit for harassment that is still pending against her by inciting conflict and I 100% see what she’s doing and am not interested in her demented manipulative abusive behaviour anymore, buh bye, abuser
I have a severe migraine that is making me vomit
I make shitposts between bouts of vomiting 🤮
on the plus side, the beta blockers are keeping me from spiraling or getting angry
just super sick to my stomach and indignant right now, very sorry.
I DESPERATELY need good quality dental care and orthodontics. This is torture, and 100% the result of severe child neglect and childhood dental neglect. My teeth are killing me.
it’ll cost $25k easy
My life feels like a living nightmare of unending physical pain.
these past 10 years in this EXTREMELY unhealthy apartment with an abusive landlord has only made things much worse.
cannot wait to leave this demented landlord behind.
also on the plus side, my landlord owes me $3,000 so rent is paid for the next 3 months at least
silver lining
oh I won’t be leaving the area or Montreal any time soon unfortunately
as my last boss, a French Catholic, decided it would be very HIP and COOL to dress up like a Catholic nun and showed up to work like this to mock me and bully me out of a job I desperately needed, now I can’t AFFORD to move away from this shithole Jesuit infested province for another year or two. Same medical supply company where Tom Mennier is somehow the ex-boyfriend of Arlene Ades who is an old friend of the company’s owner, Ronald. Just another coincidence I’m sure. Make it make sense.
This after the male hipsters at the record shop I worked at for a decade decided to start buying boxes of porn and put them in my office at work to bully me out of that job too. A record shop where the owner’s underage step-daughter was working on staff with us! Somehow the 99% male staff and owner of the company decided that buying porn and selling it with underage girls on staff was a super COOL and HIP thing to do.
seems to be a recurring theme in my life. Catholics and hipsters bullying victims of clergy abuse. Worse, Catholic hipsters.
Sick in the head, these pedophile Jesuits and their hipster creep friends in Montreal.
so relieved and happy and proud of myself
for never being compromised.
mouthy, yeah.
compromised? Oh heck no.
heart of gold
I will always remember Maude Furtado and the cokehead Barr brothers, Rufus Wainwright, and their chauvinist pig clan of elitist bullies as fucked up hipsters who ostracize and bully victims of child sexual abuse to look cool with their hipster scumbag friends in the commune
I should have known, the second Tom introduced me to Mary many years ago now, and Mary degraded me to my face because her green corduroy pants were designer clothes and mine were off the rack. What kind of vain, vapid, meanspirited people these are. Fame whores.
These hipsters in Mile End sure loved Father David Eley even though he groomed and raped boys throughout Montreal. Loved him because he worked in the film industry and knew some sleazy film director, Norman Jewison in Toronto.
cuz Dave was HIP and COOL. oh, and gay. Gay men are allowed to groom underage boys according to these hipster creeps.
Rufus Wainwright writing songs about teachers fucking their students, blaming it on the viewpoint of a middle aged woman when I know for a fact that this was one of Tom Mennier’s fantasies, of students wanting to fuck their teachers. Which he discussed with Rufus when he was writing that song Art Teacher. What a pig to pin that fantasy on a middle aged woman when the reality is it came from the mind of a man.
Tom Mennier hiding gay porn in a trunk in his bedroom but presenting as straight to his baby mother so he could convince some poor woman to have his kid. He’s gay, you fool. And now Tom Mennier is an active member of the Catholic Church hanging out with Jesuit priests. So messed up. Closeted gay man hanging out with Jesuit priests when he KNOWS they hurt boys in my foster home. Why would he do something like that? So creepy. And he works at a children’s school too. So wrong. I worry for his students.
sickos.
my landlord Lucie who was raised by Catholic nuns and hey gay best friend Robert who divorced his wife and left his kids so he could fuck men instead, works as a chef at a Catholic nun’s center. How is it possible that I’m surrounded by the very Catholic creeps I keep trying to avoid and get away from? Why does it seem to be Catholics in particular who keep sabotaging my life?
yeah. Sickos.
I see you people for who you are now.
moving to the beach, y’all can stay and rot in Montreal
enjoy Tom Mennier and his Jesuit pedos!
a community that hurts vulnerable women is not worth fighting for
choose health
living in Mile End has only contributed to GREATLY exacerbating and worsening my physical and mental health and there is a lesson in that for people struggling and committing suicide and dying of decay and neglect, cocaine addiction and alcoholism, who are within the same social circle/neighbourhood
nothing good or healthy here, only decay and frivolity
all I see is decay here now
decayed neighbourhood, decayed people, decayed lifestyle
rot.
moving to a nice, clean, healthy, modern town by the ocean with kind, healthy, brilliant, talented people
Montreal is a city in decay
I believe more than ever that Tom Mennier is a creep and not safe around children
his social circle are extremely toxic, bunch of cokehead alcoholic perverts.
some of the worst most hateful selfish celebrity obsessed people I have ever met in my entire life.
You people are hipster CANCER.
bunch of men protecting cheaters, rapists and pedophiles in the community
Disgusting people.
all I know is
this is not the neighbourhood I want to grow old and die in
I don’t want to die at all
I’m gonna go live on the beach and live another 100+ years
vancouver truly is beautiful, montreal doesn’t even come close, much as i love and appreciate quebecois culture, these mountains and beaches are gorgeous year round and accessible from downtown, not an hour or two outside the city like it is in montreal, the beaches and mountains outside of the lower mainland are even nicer 😍
best coast
halloween vibez
what a beautiful morning 😍
bewilderingly happy yet very alert and grounded
my long term memories feel much more distant and less immediately traumatizing, short term memory RECALL is better, how about that?
day 4 of propranolol. trying 10mg this morning as I’m still too stressed out to go to the hospital for blood tests and such (not a big deal, the tests themselves aren’t too bad). let’s see if this gets me out of the house and a bit more social.
I said “bon soir” to my next door neighbour a couple of nights ago as I walked by him on the sidewalk instead of scooting by and averting my eyes like I usually do lol
progress
need to secure my life against stalkers, eg mark gallo and Steve Dufour
next steps
no sharing information about future plans or current location
day 3 of inner tranquility 😭🥹
I’m quietly luxuriating in it until next week and avoiding people, bear with me, I’m recuperating. My heart feels… relief? Stress hormones are being blocked from stressing out my heart. Feels like my physical body is healing.
My whole body was so tense and exhausted for so long, just need to curl up and nap it off for a few days.
to wake up calm and grounded in the morning instead of flighty, anxious and angry with epinephrine is quite the life changing experience
I can accomplish plans and have a stable, successful career and relationships like this.
Promising.
hm
eating lunch, enjoying my life
in a great mood, beautiful autumn day
life is okay
Dear landlord, give me space/peace and do NOT talk to me or bother me in my kitchen when I’m quietly washing my dishes and minding my own business
I don’t think I have ever had a conversation with my landlord where she didn’t bring up someone being gravely ill or dying.
she just started arguing with me at my back door and I quietly and calmly nodded and smiled and walked away while she was still trying to argue with me. I refuse to engage.
she will of course frame it as her “just trying to help” as she once again harasses me and tells me to move out of my apartment. That’s HARASSMENT. It’s abusive. She won’t stop until I press charges against her, apparently.
Bully landlord is a bully!
My heart is calm, I’m calm. Everything’s fine.
This beta blocker is AMAZING.
omg I’m reacting like a normal person for once
Nod and smile and “okay there” as I calmly walk away, close my screen door and ignore her.
and now she’s texting me offering to “help” me with things that are none of her concern.
Leave me alone and let me live in peace, ma’am.
We are not and never will be friends after repeatedly swatting me (and my neighbours) with the police. Never going to happen. I was ASSAULTED because of her. She doesn’t care, all she sees are dollar bills.
whack
serenity now